little bat

i just read an article about this little bat. he was holding on to the fuel tank of the space shuttle discovery when it launched on sunday.

they said he turned around a few times but held tightly through the launch and after the shuttle cleared the tower... and then they don't know what happened to him. did he fall off? fly away? freeze in the ozone? see the earth from outer space?

they said he may have had an injured wing, which prevented him from flying away during takeoff preparation and ignition. i just imagine him, grimly holding on, afraid, afraid, afraid. maybe he wasn't afraid. maybe he was curious or excited or detached. but i imagine him feeling panic and helplessness, and it makes me feel so sad. and angry. i could be angry at nasa--and i am, a little bit--but mostly i'm angry at god or the universe or karma or fate or whatever damn thing makes things like this happen. was he hoping for divine intervention? was he looking for a way to escape?

i can't tell you how often i feel like a bat clinging to a space shuttle.

what makes it better? what makes it okay? what makes it make sense?